Thank you friends for continuing to cover Anna with prayers. I do not have an update tonight which means we all need to stay the course and continue petitioning the Lord on Anna’s behalf. It is such a blessing to have so many wonderful people always ready to pray. I know Anna’s family appreciates it greatly, too!
Our family had a pretty good day. We relaxed at the cabin until early afternoon which allowed me some much needed, quiet, one-on-one time with the Lord. Reflecting on the amazing blessings He has gifted us. Praying over the children. Thanking God for our marriage. It never fails, when I stop and take stock of my life, I am always humbled by what my Lord has done for me. For my family. Our family is the epitome of ordinary. There is nothing special about us. We struggle, stumble, mess up and fall, and yet God still chose to use us. He blessed us with the miracle of Kayleigh and trusts us to share her story. That is so humbling.
It also gives me the drive to keep moving forward. Because if Kayleigh’s story can make a difference in someone’s life, if it can draw people to Jesus, then I must figure out how to keep on. I was reminded today as I read John 4 that our job is to work for Christ. Sometimes our job is to plant the seed, sometimes it’s to harvest. We have seen God do both with Kayleigh’s story and that’s just the ones we know about.
I promised Kayleigh, before she left this earth, that I would write her story. I must say, the thought of getting these last six months into a book is a little daunting. I enjoy writing each night, sharing what the Lord has done or is doing, that’s easy. Trying to string them all together so they make sense… that’s different. But if I can trust the Lord with my baby I can trust Him to write her story.
We enjoyed dinner and a show tonight. At one point Cole reached over to use my phone but when it lit up he stopped dead in his tracks. My lock and home screens are pictures of Kayleigh. I watched as the clouds rolled over his little heart. All evening I would watch him refresh the screen just so he could see her face. I realized that for the past week I’ve been holding tight to my pictures and videos. Those things that help Kayleigh feel close to me. But he didn’t have any of those. He’s just been surviving on memories. Thankfully, I brought pictures with me so we sat on the sofa and he picked out some to carry. I also had forgotten that I videoed Kayleigh saying “I love you, Cole” on one of her good mornings. I was able to send that to his iPad so he can always have her voice. I listened tonight as he played it over and over with tears streaming down his face.
As you pray tonight would you please pray for my boy’s heart? I forget just how close they were. I’m thankful that he will talk to me and tell me what he is feeling. I just hate that I can’t make it better.
Here are some of the verses in John that spoke to me this morning.
35 You know the saying, ‘Four months between planting and harvest.’ But I say, wake up and look around. The fields are already ripe for harvest. 36 The harvesters are paid good wages, and the fruit they harvest is people brought to eternal life. What joy awaits both the planter and the harvester alike! 37 You know the saying, ‘One plants and another harvests.’ And it’s true. 38 I sent you to harvest where you didn’t plant; others had already done the work, and now you will get to gather the harvest.”