Monthly Archive: June 2017

June 9th 2017

June 9, 2017

As I sat tonight, watching my big #14 play the sport she loves, I couldn’t help but be thankful for such an amazing softball family. This time last year the same softball family was rallying around us, fighting with us for our little #14. Our lives are so different a year later. Kayleigh has left a hole in our hearts, but as I walk through the fields and am stopped by precious people, God reminds me that Kayleigh’s fingerprints can be seen on the hearts of so many people around a us. What a beautiful legacy.

This verse came to mind tonight…
Colossians 3:17
17 And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.

No matter where you are or what you are doing, you can do your very best and give all the glory to God. I pray you never forget to keep your eyes on Him.

  1. Until later,

Our Big #14

Our litte #14

We love you Kit Kat!!   💜💜💜💜

  1. ‘Carrow 💜

June 8, 2017 – Be Kind

Thank you friends for your encouraging words about this new stage of my life. It’s a little scary – but when I focus on how big our God is I am reminded that He has everything under control.

Tonight God gave me the opportunity to love on and encourage another DIPG mom. It’s amazing how encouraging someone else can be so encouraging to me. Talking about our journey reminded me of the amazing things God has done and is doing in our lives. So often we get caught up in our own lives and we miss opportunities to love on and minister to our friends.

Take a moment and slow down – see the people around you – show them kindness, love and grace – even if they don’t deserve it. Bless people with kind words or random acts of kindness. Make a choice to be the reason someone has a better day. God can do the most amazing things with your willingness to be kind.

Ephesians 4:32
32 Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.

Proverbs 3:3
3 Never let loyalty and kindness leave you! Tie them around your neck as a reminder. Write them deep within your heart.

Until Later,

As I was walking through Hobby Lobby I came across this display. Kayleigh loved pink, sparkles and anything Paris. And here was this display with her initials in the middle. What a precious reminder.

June 7, 2016

Stepping out in faith… it’s never easy. The unknown is a scary thing, especially when God asks you to leave something safe. I found that trusting God with Kayleigh was an absolute no-brainer. Not because I have some special, super faith, but because I had no other option. There was no hope on this earth, our only hope was in God’s healing.

I prayed for Kayleigh to be healed and to have a long life. God did not answer my prayers quite as I wanted, but He rarely does. During our journey Kayleigh asked Jesus into her heart which gave her eternal life – I’m pretty sure that counts as a long life. And I prayed for healing, and I know now she is whole and healthy in heaven. No, that wasn’t what I wanted, but for Kayleigh – she is enjoying perfection. As a mom I want the absolute best for my children. I find that I can be thankful that her life is now perfect but at the same time be sad for myself. I miss her, but her memory helps move me forward each day. She changed me – and I am thankful.

Before she died, I promised her I would write. I promised that no one would forget her, that I would continue to share her story, and our story of how God has carried us through. Returning to work and starting the foundation has left no time to write. The blog updates were really the extent of my writing and even those came to a stop on Mother’s Day. It’s been weighing on my heart that a change was coming. I’ve been feeling the Lord’s call on my life to write, speak, and share encouragement – but in order to follow that call, something else has to give.

Remember how I started this post? Stepping out in faith is never easy. It would have been awesome if God had asked me to let go of something I didn’t like to make room for this new opportunity, but that isn’t His way. He asked me to give up something I love dearly, something safe, something known, for the complete unknown. He asked me to have faith that this is His plan – even though I have no idea what the plan is. I don’t even really know what the next step is – I just know that He has called me to be obedient. I keep hearing this small voice in my head – “if you can trust Him with Kayleigh, why can’t you trust Him with this?”

So, I’m taking that step, letting go of what I know and love and praying for wisdom and direction for the next step. I have resigned my position at the company I have been with for nearly 11 years in order to make time to write. God has already been faithful to bring people into my life to help guide and direct my steps. I would certainly like a bit more of a plan to follow but as my friend reminded my today, my job is to just do the next thing – not to worry about what comes after that.

So stay tuned for new updates and new changes. One thing I think the Lord is leading me to is an occasional “Dear ‘Carrow” blog post. A place where you can send me questions and help guide the devotions or posts. I’m not sure exactly what it is going to look like, but I’m definitely going to need your help. Would you start sending your questions in? Send them to you can sign them with your name or something cute like you see on Dear Abby.

One thing I do know, stepping out in faith is scary, but stepping out with people that are already on our team makes it a little better. Knowing we have prayer warriors and friends like you makes a big difference. As we start this new phase of the journey this is my prayer…

John 3:30
30 He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less.

And even though I cannot see where God is leading me, I have faith that He has it completely under control…

Hebrews 11:1
11 Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.

Yes indeed, he is a Good God – worth trusting in big things and small.

Until later,

All of my children grew up at my office. I will miss Superior Steel so very much.

Why yes, I think I will work at your desk Granddady…

Serious steel calculations!


June 5, 2017 – I’m back…

Hello Friends,

Thank you for allowing me to take a much needed break. I have missed writing, but I needed a little time to rest and regroup. I am still in the process of regrouping, but I’m feeling the desire to write again. I’m not sure what this new journey is going to look like or how often I will post, I’m praying over that and I’m counting on God to work out the details – but I think it is safe to say, I’m back.

We lost another precious fighter that was close to our hearts. Sweet Aiden went home to be with Jesus last night at 11:00 pm. Her mom was one of the first people I reached out to when we found out about Kayleigh’s diagnosis. Aiden’s family has walked this long, difficult road with beautiful faith and trust. The days ahead will be hard as they settle in to a new normal. One where they will forever be missing a piece of their heart. But I have discovered, any time you find a hole in your heart – God is the perfect size and shape to fill it. Sometimes that hole is so large and the pain is so deep, all I can say to the Lord is, “Please draw me close Jesus.” It has become my mantra when the hurt jumps out and surprises me. I repeat those words over and over in my heart until I can reach my Bible and read the words that soothe my soul.

If you find yourself looking for hope, there is much to be had in God’s word. The Psalms are where I run when I need to be held…

Psalm 16:8
I know the Lord is always with me.
I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me.

Psalm 16:11
You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever.

Psalm 18:2
The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior;
my God is my rock, in whom I find protection.
He is my shield, the power that saves me,
and my place of safety.

Psalm 18:30
God’s way is perfect.
All the Lord’s promises prove true.
He is a shield for all who look to him for his protection.

See? So much hope. Words of love, faith and protection. Words I have had the joy of seeing God prove true over and over in my own life. I am so thankful for a God that loves me – and the ability to have a relationship with Him through Christ’s sacrifice for me. Isn’t God good?

Until tomorrow,