Today was a good day but a hard day. As our lives begin to settle into our new normal it’s impossible not to feel the hole left by Kayleigh’s absence. The sadness creeps in at different moments for each of us. It’s the unexpected things that hit the hardest. All I can do is hold tight to my faith in God. Trust that He is perfect and so is His plan.
Making the choice to trust is hard. Choosing to praise the Lord even when I am sad is sometimes a struggle. But I am learning – when I make that choice to praise him, my burden of grief lessens. I am able to find peace, joy and clarity. It doesn’t mean that I am not sad, because I am. Oh how I miss my precious girl. I miss holding her, kissing her, smelling her hair, hearing her laugh. I will always miss her. But the Lord continues to help me find hope in Him. Hope for eternity where I will see her again. Hope for each day as I wake and still have two precious children to love, teach, guide and protect. Hope. There is simply nothing more powerful than the hope of salvation through Christ.
7 I will be glad and rejoice in your unfailing love, for you have seen my troubles, and you care about the anguish of my soul. 8 You have not handed me over to my enemies but have set me in a safe place.
10 Hear me, Lord, and have mercy on me. Help me, O Lord.” 11 You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy, 12 that I might sing praises to you and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give you thanks forever!
24 So be strong and courageous, all you who put your hope in the Lord!
This is Kayleigh’s purple fountain the night of her visitation. Oh how she would have loved that purple water!