Monthly Archive: December 2016

Thank you Lord for another beautiful day. Today was busy as I continued my decluttering mission. It was also a better day for me emotionally. Even though I was going through Kayleigh’s things, God was good to fill me with peace and guard my heart from overwhelming grief. Yes, there was still sadness, but it was manageable.

I pray each day for God to guard our hearts and minds. It’s so easy to get side tracked, caught up in grief, to take our eyes off the Father. And when our eyes are not on Him we are easy targets for the devil.

My verses tonight are just what I needed to hear from the Lord.

Philippians 4:6-7
6 Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. 7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

Psalm 3:3
3 But you, O Lord, are a shield around me; you are my glory, the one who holds my head high.

Philippians is my reminder to be thankful for all that he has done. And it gives me the promise that He will reward our thankful hearts with peace – as well as guard our hearts and minds.

Psalm 3:3 fills me with joy and hope. It reminds me that I am loved, safe and protected. Truly, if the maker of the universe is the one who is holding up my head whom do I fear?

So tonight as a turn in for the night, I do so with a thankful heart. One that is so thankful for my Heavenly Father and His eternal grace and mercy. I pray each of you is able to feel His love and peace – and be filled with joy this beautiful Christmas season!

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

It seems our elves decided we needed more purple in our house – so they brought purple trees!

Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.
– 2 Corinthians 12:9

This is me tonight. Today has been a good day, but it has also been an emotional day. A day where I have felt the weight of Kayleigh’s absence. It’s a void that cannot be described. It’s just empty. And it’s not just me – Tim, Grace, Cole and I have all had moments of sadness today. I found Cole standing in Kayleigh’s room tonight, just staring at her stuffed animals and the pictures of her around the room. All he could say is “I just miss her.”

I think that is where I am too. My heart is at peace, because I know God’s plan is perfect. I have hope, because I know I will see Kayleigh again. I have joy, because my trust is in God Almighty. But even with all of God’s goodness, grace and mercy – I still miss her. I miss her smile. Her hugs. Her touch. Her smell. The sound of her voice. My arms still ache to hold her and my heart still hurts. Honestly, if I live to be 100, those things will never change, but I know my Savior will never leave me. He will always be with me to heal my broken heart and bind up my wounds.

As always, when my heart is broken, God speaks to me through His word. My devotion tonight said, “adversity is God’s choice tool for building character, deepening our relationship with Christ, and equipping us for future ministry.” And then I read 2 Corinthians 12:9 which reminds me that God’s grace is all I need, and that His power works best in my weakness. I can attest to the fact that this is true. It certainly isn’t how I would have chosen to grow in Christ, but it has changed me for the better and I am thankful.

Each day our precious girl’s story touches people hearts. Her seven years were the perfect number for her. God is good to continuously share Kayleigh’s legacy with us through the stories from others. Stories of hope, change, growth and redemption. So, yes – I just miss her. I will always miss her, but I know God is going to get all of us through this. And not just help is survive the heartache, but I believe He is going to help us thrive.

Psalm 147:3
3 He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.

Psalm 55:22
22 Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.

Thank you for continuing to walk with us on this journey. Please keep praying for each of us as we process and grieve differently.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

This is the top of our Christmas tree, it seemed appropriate to make it purple. That’s Kayleigh’s 1 year portrait on the wall – it looks like she approves.

“When you are looking to God and His purposes, your limitations become opportunities to see Him do the impossible!” – Christine Caine

What a beautiful way to view our limitations. So often when God asks us to do something, we waste time telling Him why we can’t. We aren’t equipped. We aren’t prepared. We aren’t educated enough. We just can’t figure out why God would ask us to do it in the first place. We’re ordinary, sometimes broken, and never good enough. I mean really, why on earth would he ask us to do something? Especially something important?

I know I’ve been there before, when my limitations stop me from accomplishing what God is calling me to do. But that isn’t how we are designed to be! We are designed to love God and be obedient to His commands. The Creator of the Universe doesn’t make mistakes. If He is telling you to do something it is because it’s a part of His plan for you. You may not feel ready, but if you choose to be faithful
he will direct your path.

The lesson I was studying tonight made a point to remind me that the apostles were ordinary people too. People that made mistakes, denied Christ himself, and broke their promises. Yet God chose to use them. And, because they were obedient, they have changed the world.

I love that quote at the beginning of this post. It’s all about perspective. If our eyes are on our Heavenly Father, and we are walking with him, God will accomplish great things with us. We just simply have to be willing.

***If you read this post last night I had different verses. But I read these this morning and they were a perfect fit to how I was feeling.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

December 2, 2016

“You Make Me Brave”

I stand before You now
The greatness of your renown
I have heard of the majesty and wonder of you
King of Heaven, in humility, I bow

As Your love, in wave after wave
Crashes over me, crashes over me
For You are for us
You are not against us
Champion of Heaven
You made a way for all to enter in

I have heard You calling my name
I have heard the song of love that You sing
So I will let You draw me out beyond the shore
Into Your grace
Your grace

You make me brave
You make me brave
You call me out beyond the shore into the waves
You make me brave
You make me brave
No fear can hinder now the love that made a way

You make me brave
You make me brave
You call me out beyond the shore into the waves
You make me brave
You make me brave
No fear can hinder now the promises you made
You make me brave
You make me brave
No fear can hinder now the love that made a way
Bethel Music

This song is one of about 80 songs that are on our KB or Kayleigh playlist. If you happened to visit our home in the last couple of months we were likely to have the lights down and the KB playlist of praise and worship music playing in the house at all times. This is also the same music we had playing at Kayleigh’s viewing and celebration of life service. This song really made me think of Kayleigh’s attitude and fight for the last six months. Honestly, this song makes me think about every St. Jude’s patient that we came in contact with while Kayleigh was in Memphis. New patients often times were scared or timid but that only lasted for a short time. After a few days, these children would feel safe and be confident. They fed off of the love and compassion from the doctors, nurses, and St. Jude workers that all contribute to give these extremely sick kids world class treatment and care – and most importantly hope. These kids learn to fight for their lives and in a lot of cases teach their parents how to fight as well. St. Jude Hospital in Memphis, TN became Kayleigh’s safe place and second home away from home. I am sure that is true for many St. Jude patients. The parents of St. Jude patients quickly become family – caring for each other in every situation. Whether you child is fighting aggressive cancer or is just in town for a quick check-up, everyone understands . The goal of every St. Jude parent is the same and that is to fight for your child and make sure that your child knows they don’t have to fight their sickness alone. From the beginning we became part of the St. Jude family with all of the families that God placed in our path for the good. A lot of families give up jobs, homes, whatever it takes to be with their children at St. Jude or other great cancer institutions all over. These are just a few families that had an impact on our family in just a short time and each and every one on this list battled or are currently battling their own rare disease.
#Prayersforsawyer
#AnnasArmy
#DebraNorthington #Jon-MichaelNorthington
#PrayersforSuperSweetSydney
#Kaleighstrust
#SuperSam
#AllintoWinFoundation
#defeatDIPG
#ParkerLovesLife
#prayersforaidenaunton
#GoTeamDamian
#Paisleesprayerposse

Tomorrow morning St. Jude will host the St. Jude Marathon in Memphis, TN. This is the single largest annual fundraiser for St. Jude Research hospital and takes place in and around the St. Jude campus in downtown Memphis. There will be over 40,000 participants in the race events tomorrow. Unfortunately, ‘Carrow and I were not able to participate like we had originally wanted this year. St. Jude obviously has a place in our heart and will continue to be a special place for us and our family after the treatment and care that Kayleigh received. We made lifelong friends at St. Jude including patient families, nurses, doctors, and staff in every building we frequented. Tomorrow we have between 25-30 close friends from Hartselle and North Alabama running on Team Kayleigh. My sister is also running solo tomorrow in honor or Kayleigh. We also have 80 new friends from the Jasper Track Club in Jasper, AL running in honor of our amazing girl. No, we cannot be there to run for Kayleigh, but she is being honored by some very special people. St. Jude is an amazing place, and our family will be supporters from now on. I urge you to consider supporting St. Jude if you don’t already. And honestly if you are unable to donate monetarily to St. Jude Hospital then you can easily pray for the kids, patients and families of St. Jude. We are living proof that prayer makes a huge difference. Thank you to everyone running tomorrow for Team Kayleigh and all of St. Jude Hospital!

Colossians 4:2-5
2. Devote yourselves to prayer with an alert mind and thankful heart. 3. Pray for us too, that God will give us many opportunities to speak about his mysterious plan concerning Christ. 4. Pray that I will proclaim this message as clearly as I should. 5. Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity. 6. Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone.

Until Tomorrow Tim

My big sis getting ready to race for Kayleigh.

Team Kayleigh arriving in Memphis.

Awesome to see all the families represented here.

Jasper Track Club running in honor of Kayleigh.

Our awesome Team Kayleigh jerseys.

Merry Christmas Folks! It’s my absolute favorite time of year. And even though this season will be hard, it doesn’t make it any less wonderful. We’ll just have to learn to navigate the season with our new “normal.” We will also be spending a substantial amount of time praying for peace, wisdom, and healing.

One of the most wonderful gifts God has brought to me recently is a special visitor. One of my dearest friends from high school, my matron of honor, the Blair that my Kayleigh Blair was named after, has come to stay with me a few days this week. There is little that is better than sitting with someone that not only knows you, but understands you as well. Understanding without words is a gift. Especially now when words are sometimes hard to get out. There are no expectations, just love and support.

And because this is one of my dearest and oldest friends we are spending our time talking, cleaning, and organizing my house. After 7 months of having many different people help us around the house, I can seem to find anything! We also have accumulated many things that just need to be put away. Clutter is everywhere and it is driving me crazy. I just can’t help but feel if I can get my house in order I will feel better.

Then today I open my devotion and it was talking about clutter. Specifically, about decluttering our minds. So often our heads get full of so much junk we don’t have the time to think about our relationship with Christ. We get caught up in all the little things of life and miss what it is God is doing. Just like the clutter in my house makes me feel unsettled so does the clutter in my mind. Gods reminder to me today was that I don’t have to live with the clutter anywhere.

He sent my sweet friend to help me get my house in order. More importantly, God sent His son to get my head and heart in order. What a precious gift from my savior.

Colossians 3:2
Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth.

Proverbs 4:23 – Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

These were the awesome people that did no shave November to raise funds for Kayleigh. What an amazing day!