Monthly Archive: January 2017

Today has just one of those days. The devil has been on the offensive all day, attacking us from every direction. The weather was dreary, the kids didn’t feel 100%, work had numerous little hiccups, Tim hasn’t felt well, and all of us have had a “missing Kayleigh” kind of sad day. And to top it off I’m writing tonight’s post for the second time because a technology glitch ate the first one right before I could hit the “publish” button. I’m ready to go to bed and just start over tomorrow.

But in the midst of all the rubbish of today God was so good to give me one of His “ah ha!” moments. It never ceases to amaze me how those moment pop up at the most unusual times. Of course it’s the time I need them most, because this God of mine knows every little thing about me and exactly what I need.

So my “ah ha!” came as I tucked Cole in tonight. Night time is hard when you’re sad. Just too much time to think and Cole’s thoughts were on Kayleigh. So, I purposefully tried to help reroute Cole’s thoughts to something brighter. The PFK Foundation is a big topic of conversation around our house, so we spent some time talking about what the foundation is about, and how Cole could be involved and help. We talked about how even though Kayleigh isn’t here, we can keep her memory alive by continuing to fight in her name.

As soon as I uttered those words I started remembering some very specific prayer times I had with the Lord this summer. I remember praying for the impossible, for Kayleigh to beat DIPG. I prayed specifically that she would be the kid that beats it and is able to show the doctors how to beat it in other children. I prayed big, bold prayers – and God granted me such peace – peace that He was going to answer those prayers. And then, Kayleigh died. And my prayer weren’t answered. Or were they?

Enter the PFK Foundation. This foundation is Kayleigh’s legacy. It is coming together and growing by exponential leaps and bounds all because of our little fighter. Her story continues to grow. People continue to share. Our goal for PFK is to help Kayleigh keep fighting DIPG. And that’s when it hit me – even though she isn’t here – she can still beat DIPG. Her foundation will continue to fight in her name. Raising money to fund research. Being a voice for these children and families that just can’t speak for themselves right now. Kayleigh can still be the kid that helps the doctors figure out what to do next. And yet again, the Lord shows me that He did indeed answer my prayers.

When I prayed those prayers I really wanted Kayleigh to beat cancer here and stay with me on this earth. I know if God had granted her a miracle it would have been amazing, but it would not have galvanized people to move – not like the tragedy of her death has. And while I miss her more every day, I know that this is just a drop of time in the bucket of eternity.

This verse continues to play in my mind…

Esther 4:14b
14b Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for just such a time as this?”

Perhaps I was made Kayleigh’s mommy for such a time as this. To continue her fight. To help her beat this cancer for other children and their families.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

Because if anyone can beat this, it’s Kayleigh and her warriors. And because she’s worth the fight

After such wonderful news yesterday tonight’s report is a little anticlimactic… but I am TOTALLY ok with that. I vote my family gets to be normal, average, ordinary, and maybe just a wee bit boring for a while. Oh, how lovely that sounds!

Of course, I don’t really thing God has boring in the cards for us. Kayleigh’s 5k/Fun Run/Birthday Bash is starting to come together. I can’t wait to share more info, but for now, just know you are going to want to mark Saturday, May 13th on your calendar if you are in the Hartselle, AL area. It’s going to be one awesome shindig. Kayleigh Bug would have approved I am quite certain!

Grace and Cole continue to improve. Grace is healed to about 85% and Cole is about 60%. Grace should be back to full speed in a week or so. Cole is probably going to take a bit longer. I let him try school today. He made it about 4 hours before it did him in. He was willing to keep pushing on to stay, but thankfully his teacher has good instincts and was able to let me know he really had reached the end of what was good for him. Hopefully he will be able to make it longer tomorrow and the pain will continue to decrease.

Tonight’s pictures are a gift from Kayleigh’s friend Anna. One of Anna’s favorite things to do is indoor snowball fights! Her mom Jodi decided we needed some of Anna’s brand of fun, so they sent us a box of snowballs! We had a great time tossing them around the living room.

Romans 15:13
13 I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

As I sit here and begin to type tonight my heart is overflowing with joy and gratitude. For only the second time in 8.5 months I have good, personal news to report. Yes, God has helped us see the positive in every circumstance along the way, and for that I am so very thankful. But… having 100% good news to report? That is a rare thing.

The pathology reports for Grace and Cole both came back today. And both are CLEAR!!! Clear!!! My heart is so thankful for God’s grace and goodness. For His amazing mercy and continued blessings. I am so thankful that I was able to sit down with my babies tonight and we could thank the Lord together for answering our prayers. So thankful that they had the opportunity to experience His goodness for themselves.

Tonight I am able to take a deep breath for the first time in a very long time. At this moment, my family is safe and healthy. I know that can change at any moment, and I trust the Lord, whatever He may ask. But tonight – tonight – God is granting me relief and rest.

Thank you for your continued prayers for our family. We will never be able to adequately thank each of you for helping us walk this road and carry this burden. I am looking forward to sharing more good news of upcoming events in the near future.

Isaiah 25:1
1 O Lord, I will honor and praise your name, for you are my God. You do such wonderful things! You planned them long ago, and now you have accomplished them.

Psalm 116:1-2
1 I love the Lord because he hears my voice and my prayer for mercy. 2 Because he bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath!

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

January 22, 2017

It is a rare occasion when I am able to visit a friend’s Church on the same Sunday that I am running sound at our Church. ‘Carrow decided to keep both Grace and Cole home this morning and give them more rest before we jump back into a crazy week. It is also a rare occasion when I am the one writing the post but today was one of those days I told ‘Carrow I wanted to write. I received an awesome message a few days back from a couple of dear friends that became close to Kayleigh and our entire family when Kayleigh was first diagnosed with DIPG. I received the message that our friend had prayed to receive Christ and he was going to be baptized today and invited us to join in on this important day. So this morning the service time could not have been a better fit in before our late service today. The service started with some awesome praise and worship that led up to the Baptism of many. Our friends just happened to be in the first group being baptized and we were invited to join them at the front of the church. The congregation was cheering as each group made their way to the baptismal waters. Before each group was baptized, each personal testimony was read to the entire congregation. I joined in with the family and friends at the front of the church surrounding our friends as their testimonies were read for everyone to hear. And then I hear my daughters name clearly spoken as to why this person had been moved to see they needed a change in their life. Yes we have received messages from all over how Kayleigh’s story have changed many lives, but today I was able to hear it and see it in person and see dear friends with Jesus in their hearts. I pray that her story continues to show the Faith , Hope , and Love that we have in our Savior Jesus Christ, to a world that truly needs it.

Gal 3:27
And All who have been united with Christ in baptism have put on Christ, like putting on new clothes.

I heard Kayleigh’s name and honestly couldn’t hold back tears because it was an extremely proud moment of my child and her story that God continues to use for his glory and to grow his Kingdom. What is holding you back?

Thank you for the continued prayers. As of this evening Cole is much more mobile and is dealing with the pain better than before and his battle scar is healing nicely. Please keep our friend that had the ATV accident yesterday in yours prayers. The lord has been good to protect him, but he still needs prayers for continued healing.

Until Tomorrow,
Mr. Whiskers

Kayleigh loved seeing Mr. Andy ride for her.

Fits today’s baptism.

No words.  Just gratitude for our friends.

I have very little to report from the home front and that is a blessing. Both Grace and Cole continue to mend. Grace is nearly back to normal. She is still having occasional discomfort and headaches now and then, but overall she is doing remarkably well. Cole is continuing to get better. It is a slow process for him, but each day is bringing a little less pain. It will be quite a while before he is back to his old self, but he is moving in the right direction.

We continue to be thankful for the Lord’s provision. Having medical scares with both children, right after Kayleigh’s death, seems like it should be frightening. Especially when the medical scares are both things that require pathology to rule out any type of cancer. Yet, as always, our Lord has shown up in amazing ways. We have had peace from the beginning. One of the amazing things Kayleigh’s journey has taught us is that God’s way always work out.

I received a message last week that has continued to resonate in my head. A different perspective on these medical issues. That maybe Grace and Cole are both facing something similar to Kayleigh’s in order to show them that not all situations are the same. That they don’t have to be afraid of the doctor. That our God does indeed answer our prayers for healing. I certainly do not know the Lord’s mind, but I do like that perspective.

Please continue to pray the pathology reports come back clear. We hope to have answers on both kids by Monday afternoon. Would you also pray for some friends of ours? They were involved in a freak accident and the husband was severely injured. He is in surgery to stop internal bleeding and I know they would very much appreciate your prayers for healing, peace, comfort and wisdom for the doctors. We know our God is able.

Psalm 107:19-21
19 “Lord, help!” they cried in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress. 20 He sent out his word and healed them, snatching them from the door of death. 21 Let them praise the Lord for his great love and for the wonderful things he has done for them.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

I liked this quote. I’m just a sapling, but I pray the Lord will continue to deepen my roots and grow me into what He has in store for me.