Monthly Archive: January 2017

Philippians 3:14
14 I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

If you guys couldn’t tell by my post last night, I’m really excited about what we have planned this year to honor Kayleigh, increase awareness for DIPG, and raise funds to help find a cure. It’s possible I’m even more excited tonight because I’ve had all day for ideas to roll through my head. Plans, logistics, artwork, logos, sponsors… the list goes on and on.

I can see how easy it would be to get tangled up in WHAT we are doing and forget the WHY. Yes, everything that is in the works is amazing. But the reason we are doing these things is because the Lord blessed us with Kayleigh. He trusted us to be her parents for 7 years. He trusted us to trust Him. He is trusting us now to continue to point all the praise to Him for what He has done. And what amazing things He has done.

He has blessed us with friends and strangers alike, coming together for an amazing event. I can’t wait to see what God has in store for this – but it is so very important to keep that perspective. Watching for what God is going to do. Not getting lost in all the big stuff – and never allowing it to be about us. Because we are not special. We are ordinary. We have short comings. We are broken. We certainly are nothing without Christ.

So as I continue to be excited, and wow – I really am, it is of the utmost importance that I remember to focus my excitement on that which matters most. Pressing on to the finish. Working for the heavenly prize, not focusing on what this world has to offer. Following God’s plan for my life. Encouraging other people with the love of Christ which knows no bounds.

My heart continues to overflow with thankfulness. I can say with confidence that my God is good, and that He has never left me, no matter how hard the road is. How beautiful it is to be allowed to talk to God Almighty. To praise Him, thank Him, and occasionally weep as His feet. That is news worthy to be shared!

2 Corinthians 1:3-5
3 All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. 4 He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. 5 For the more we suffer for Christ, the more God will shower us with his comfort through Christ.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

Some things are just SO worth it.

Today has been one of those whirlwind kind of days. Absolutely packed to the gills – thankfully, with good things. Much of today was our normal life and activities coming back online. Seeing a routine begin to form is more of a blessing than I can adequately describe. I’ve always been a spontaneous kind of girl, I never thought I would be so happy to see normal!

One thing that continues to bring me joy every day is watching Kayleigh’s legacy grow. Messages from people that let us know that her story has made a difference in their lives. People stopping to let us know they have been praying for us. Seeing purple KB stickers on cars around town and not even knowing who is in the car. Knowing that while Kayleigh isn’t with us right now, that no one has forgotten her. I think as her mother now, that is my worst fear – that people will forget her.

Losing Kayleigh to cancer was horrible. But seeing how that one little light caught the world on fire – that is dumbfounding. I never could have imagined the impact her life would have. Now, Tim and I want to keep her legacy growing. Yes, I am writing her book. I also am doing some devotion writing and guest blog posts in the future. I’m looking forward to sharing just how good God has been to us through all of this. His mercy, grace and peace are sufficient and so much more.

We are also in the process of setting up the Prayers For Kayleigh Foundation. The goal of the PFK Foundation will be to help raise funds and awareness for cancer research – specifically DIPG. This is the most direct way for us to make sure the money raised goes directly to research. We need to find a way to stop this vicious disease. These babies and their families deserve long, full lives. Not 6-9 months and a 0% survival rate.

Not long after Tim and I started tossing the foundation idea around we heard from a good friend that they were planning a Kayleigh 5k fundraiser here in Hartselle. To make the event little more special it will be held on May 13th. That will be the one year anniversary of her DIPG diagnosis. Not only that, but it would have been her 8th birthday. What a great way to celebrate.

But in true Kayleigh fashion, the idea continued to grow. Since it’s her birthday it seemed only appropriate to have a shindig to celebrate. So, Saturday morning we are going to have the Prayers For Kayleigh 5k and Fun Run, then Saturday night we are going to have a concert! I can’t help but smile. My little diva would be seriously pumped. I hope she has time to look down through the floor boards in heaven and get at least a glimpse.

Stay tuned for more details in the coming days. I really didn’t intend to let the cat out of the bag yet but I’m too excited not to tell. Besides, who better to share good news with than the people who have stood with us through all the hard times? If any of you or someone you know might be interested in helping us sponsor Kayleigh’s special day, please send us a private message here on the page or to our prayersforkayleigh@gmail.com address.

It is going to be an awesome celebration. A time to remember our baby, and work towards saving other families babies. As I think about the future these verses are a perfect fit…

1 Samuel 12:24
24 But be sure to fear the Lord and faithfully serve him. Think of all the wonderful things he has done for you.

God certainly has been wonderful to us. We want to continue to faithfully serve Him, telling everyone we come in contact with just how amazingly He has blessed us when you would think it is impossible to feel blessed.

And as we get excited about the future we must remember to keep our eyes on what is most important. Our relationship with Christ. This PFK Foundation has the potential to help make a difference. But our first priority is to the Lord.

Romans 12:11
11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

I’m quite certain if Kayleigh was here she would be riding around like this. My favorite part is what isn’t pictured. The person that had been pulling her wagon before this pic was none other than Dr. Vic Wilson, our Hartselle City schools Superintendent. Pretty awesome superintendent don’t you think?. Talk about riding in style – but then again, that’s just SO Kayleigh.

God’s timing is always perfect, in every detail. I love writing every night. It helps me process the day and everything that is going on inside me. I often times have people tell me “it’s ok if you don’t want to write every day.” And yes, there are some days it’s hard to figure out where to start. But, I have discovered that it is often those nights that I don’t feel like making a post that I need it most. The Lord always meets me when I write. Sometimes writing is what reveals to me what God has been doing. Not to mention, in the beginning God made it clear to me that we were on this journey to help other people, and I promised that as long as He would give me words I would write.

So, all of that being said, I am going to share the blog with another writer tonight, my mom. I’m tired and the Lord knew I would need a little break. Not to mention I’ve spent most of my night reading all of the wonderful posts and comments from last night. Thank you all for your kind words.

Thoughts from my mom – Beth Rabb

It’s hard to believe it has only been two months since Kayleigh died. Oh, how we miss her! I find myself counting grandchildren and realizing one is missing. I find a random Kayleigh sock or see a purple sky. I have an empty seat in the “Bess Bus” and there is no Kayleigh to separate the boys. She was Will and Miller’s best buddy, advocate, protector and mediator.

In the midst of our great loss, not only has God been sufficient, He has been gracious. We have seen the body of Christ on their knees, the town of Hartselle and surrounding communities rally around us, strangers come to know Jesus, while Muslims and Buddhists heard the gospel. We have experience Philippians 4:7, the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding… and been given the hope that we will be reunited with Kayleigh in heaven.

‘Carrow’s faith and determination keeps me on track and holds me accountable in my daily walk. I want to be so tuned in with Christ that I take every thought captive to obey Christ, 2 Corinthians 10:5b. As I child my mom tucked me in at night and we said prayers — the perfect ending to the day. As I grew in my faith, I realized that waiting until bedtime to confess my sins and make request was not very effective. Why not confess the sin once it is recognized and keep walking?

When our children were small and needed disciplining — maybe timeout or a spanking — afterwards, they would have to apologize and then pray and ask for forgiveness. The idea was to teach them how to breath spiritually by exhaling and confessing the sin and inhaling God’s love and forgiveness. It was not only a good lesson for them, but for me as well. Prayer is my direct line to the Father and I am so thankful he is always available and hears my cry. When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. Ps 34:17

My real purpose in writing this post is to ask you to pray specifically for a hedge of protection around Tim and ‘Carrow. We know Satan doesn’t care about us if we are just letting life happen. It’s when we are out front, making a difference, that’s when he aims his fiery darts at us. It would be easy for Tim and ‘Carrow to be his target. They have a lot of decisions to make, there are some health issues in the family, plans for a big fundraiser for St. Jude’s DIPG research and the everyday stresses of life. Please pray they stay focused on Christ and finish the race strong.

I am grateful for the thousands of people praying for us. The old saying, walking on the prayers of saints, is very appropriate. Thank you for continuing to pray. Your prayers are powerful; we feel and see the results everyday!

Beth

My mom is pretty fantastic. She even sent me pictures to post as well.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

First day of school August 2015

Everyone loaded up in the Bess Bus!

Philippians 4:19
19 And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.

How amazing it is to be cared for by a God that loves us and tends our every need. Recently I was talking with the Lord, sharing by hurts. Most days truly are good days. But there are times, often at night, when I am tired, my guard is down, and grief just comes crashing through. As I sat on my bed with tears streaming down my face I told the Lord that I understood His plan was perfect. That I would never want Kayleigh to return to this broken earth when she is perfect and happy in heaven. But even knowing those things doesn’t make me miss her less. The emptiness of my arms is just overwhelming. I told the Lord, “All I want to do is hold her face. Trace her nose and brows like I used to do to help her sleep. Kiss her precious head and hold her face in my hands.” All I want is the impossible.

Move forward a couple of days. I am in Kayleigh’s room trying to go through some of the things we have accumulated over these months and put away things from Memphis. As I am in the depths of her closet I touch something strange. As I uncover everything and pull it out the tears begin to flow. From the bottom of Kayleigh’s closet I pulled the desire of my heart. It was Kayleigh’s face.

Her radiation mask to be exact, but it is her perfect little face resting in the palm of my hands. I sat in the floor of her room, closed my eyes, and ran my fingers down the bridge of her nose, around her eyes, across her brows. I could feel every bit of her profile. I could kiss her head. God answered my impossible request.

Honestly, I sold the Lord short. I told Him what I wanted but I never expected Him to actually answer the request. To my human mind it was an impossible request that had no way to be answered. This would be a prime example of how the Lord continues to answer my prayers in the most unimaginable ways. The desire of my heart was to touch Kayleigh’s face, and He provided me a way to ease my heart.

Tonight as you go to bed are you selling the Lord short? Are you not asking Him for something because it seems ridiculously impossible? Psalm 37:4 says
“Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desires.” If you are doing your part, serving the Lord, walking His path for you, taking delight in Him, His word tells us He will give us the desires of our hearts. Not only that, God will take care of you better than you can imagine and bless you infinitely more than you can think or ask. What a gracious, compassionate father we serve.

Ephesians 3:20
20 Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜

All I wanted was to hold this face…

And this was how God granted the desire of my heart 💜

What a lovely weekend it has been. For the first time in longer than I can remember we had no obligations. Due to the threat of severe weather the kids were out Friday so we wound up with a long weekend. We stayed home, sat by the fire, watched movies, enjoyed being together, and worshiping together as a family today. Between God’s word and time with my family I feel restore and ready for a new week.

Our new normal is steadily growing. We are learning how to be a family of four. Learning how to be kind to each other, trying to extend grace and mercy – often times when the other person doesn’t deserve it. We’re learning how to wade through grief that shows up as sadness or anger. Learning to turn to the Savior when we don’t know how to respond or what to do with all the rolling emotions.

Slowly but surely I am watching our family change, heal, grow, and transform. Watching God answer our prayers and direct us down His path. How thankful I am for His abundant grace, abounding patience, and limitless love.

Romans 12:2
2 Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow 💜

I pray she has good cause to grin like this in heaven. Oh how we love you sweet girl!