Happy Sunday, Friends –
Things are much the same today. Kayleigh was not nearly as sleepy today which made for a wonderful day of chats, rest and family time. Kayleigh has actually been fairly stable the past few days, so Tim felt good about getting out and taking the older kids to church. It was great for them to get out, be with friends, and be refilled spiritually.
I stayed home with Kayleigh. We napped, and she feasted on jello. She was so tired yesterday that she didn’t eat a great deal. This morning she woke starving! It was great to see her with a good appetite with all chewing and swallowing working well. At one point tonight she looked at me and said “why do you keep treating me like a baby?” Ha! Her independent streak has been becoming a little stronger each day. That doesn’t mean she has gotten any better, it just means she’s a stubborn, hardheaded, “I’ll do it myself” little girl. She must get that from her daddy… um, well maybe a little from me too… Ok, a lot from me too. Poor thing, she’s got stubborn coming from all directions – but I’m pretty sure that tenacity is one of her best traits when it come to fighting. That and her good attitude. You know, I don’t think it’s ever even crossed her mind to have a bad attitude about all of this. I’m sure that could change at any moment, but for now I’m thankful for both the stubborn and the attitude.
The closest she’s come to asking why this is happening to her happened last week. She looked at me, struggling to talk, and said “why can’t I be like a normal girl?” Oh my heart. I gave her the only truthful answer I knew – because of that stupid tumor. To which she said “I just want to be a normal girl.” I had no answers for her, I just scooped her up in my lap and rocked her.
Over the last few days as I have thought about those words I know that is one wish that will never be granted. “Normal” is something Kayleigh will never be. She certainly isn’t normal now, not because of cancer, but because of the way she continues to touch hearts everyday just by being her beautiful self. If the Lord grants our request for healing she certainly will be anything but normal – she will be a walking miracle. And if she is healed eternally by going to heaven she will be so much more than normal – she will be perfect.
Tim and I have be blessed to be able to grant every wish Kayleigh has had to this point, but this one just isn’t possible. And tonight, as I look at my sweet girl, I know I pray for so much more than “normal.” I’m so thankful that this wish will go unfulfilled.
My verses for you tonight are some I read today from my sweet cousin. It so perfectly describes how we are able to continue fighting for Kayleigh everyday. Where our strength comes from. As long as we keep ourselves rooted by the stream of Living Water we will not falter. It’s the moments when I take my eyes off of Him that I struggle. Or when I try to do it myself – that’s when the load gets heavy. But when I remember to keep my rooted planted deeply and my eyes on the Lord, then, and only then, do I find complete peace.
Jeremiah 17:7-8
7 “But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. 8 They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit.
Until tomorrow,
‘Carrow💜
Check out Aubie cheering for Kayleigh. I don’t care if I am a Bama grad and fan – that is awesome. I’ll give you a War Eagle for that 💜
